Man I do not know on where to start, my mind is a boggle of a mess. Emotionally and exhausted. Like those that have gone before me I am in a corner. A dark place where my nose is pressed against the wall because of my ill behavior and it’s not pleasant. A spanking would get the ordeal over with faster and a whole lot less painful.
Kind of like in the days of my growing up we were spanked you learned real quick on what to not do to avoid these confrontations but with mass medias retelling horror stores we are now all forbidden to spank our children when they really need a swat on the backside. As you grow up you have to learn to think for yourself and then those spankings become less effective which is why I am in this corner.
I had listened to Greg Laurie’s prior webcast on a lonely heart. As you can see I have placed the link here for those you are curious and he is an awesome speaker, just today my moods is not set right. But enjoy this link on your own! http://www.harvest.org/webcast/player.php?section=archive&event=10&id=1320
Normally when listening on their service I feel uplifted and it wasn’t so today. Should have known by the title for some reason thought it would be about being a lonely person, lost in the world of becoming a new believer. Nah it was about dealing with being single then explaining how married people can feel lonely.
This I know because I was married once and was very alone, except while you can be alone in a marriage you are not unlike the single woman. Men can handle being singlehood. Any man can get a date if he applied himself when it’s not true for the woman. It’s worst when you refuse to turn yourself into a pretzel to land a man and I wasn’t limber enough.
If I was acting like the typical female dog, it got their attention but it wasn’t a personality that I was proud of and it wasn’t naturally apart of me and certainly not what I wanted either. Now that I am in my fifties and in the grips of menopause, it’s so much easier to handle being alone, single in the world. Funny hot flashes, night sweats and prolong headaches and nausea being good for anything? But it suits the single woman in me.
However in listening he did recite a Psalm that I kind of remember was his favorite and it is the Psalms 37:4 -5 from ESV Bible
“Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act”
Luckily for me the pastor went on to say it is us who needs to seek the Lord and it is in doing so our holes are filled and it’s not always by way of that dreamy man we want. Lucky I guess?
Got the message hopefully one day soon through prayers I can be rid of that hole that has reappeared like the sinks holes we hear about gobbling up homes, cars and people.
To leave on a better note I finally went out and bought those funky nail polishes with all the glitter in it, put it on and now my nails are sparkling pink! It doesn’t take much to make me happy like some think? Now to go make that healthy salad slice up the cantaloupe and see what happens next!
* photograph of a pair of lambs
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(have you seen a cuter pic of lambs before!)