“Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress; he sent out his word and healed them, and delivered them from destruction. Let them thank the Lord for his steadfast love, for his wonderful works to humankind”
I had prepared this blog earlier before hearing the news and actually believe I had hit publish now I wonder? Do I keep it as it was or change to reflect the events of today?
Problem is we are always being hit with news that is more often unhealthy, adding nothing more than stress when there is so much out there that can be encouraging. While the problems of the Colorado incident grieves me dearly, just can’t allow fear to be ruling another day in my life.
Don’t know if I am explaining this correctly but fear is my issue. No I am not afraid of things like walking from my car in a parking lot late at night, been doing it a very long time. What I am afraid of is trusting others including God with my heart and my desires for the life that would be one I crave for. Afraid that I may not land a job before my EDD runs out, came close to losing my home last month, the stress of that is still gripping my chest and I fear for our country and it’s people using horrible situations like what happened as a reason for giving up our rights, our freedoms.
As I heard about the massacre for the first time by DJ’s on the radio, they were talking about what kinds of excuses will they come up with other than the person is a lunatic. There are no excuses for his behavior. As a new believer would say he has lost his way, gone off the deep edge, still the bottom line no one is at fault other than himself and no when a person leaves the perimeters of normalcy there are not enough safe guards to stop them. They do not see or feel what we do, the only thingsthat happens is our lives become restricted and not in a good way.
Those poor victims and their families what can you say? They need all the prayers they can get and so do we as a nation as a person living in a world that has been turned upside down.
Like I said my blog was written before noon and ever since then without the news seemed to be one where I have felt lost, living in a place where either I am not wanted or don’t belong. Being a fish out of water is pretty much normal experience for me, never have lined up with the people around me, when I do catch up it’s too late.
So while it seems it’s a good leeway into the title what is more important, belonging getting that necessary feeding of acceptance or having a purpose, will leave it for tomorrow. With the news blasting what we cannot bear in pain, feeling the hopeless of those people I’m leaving what was for a very brief moment a faint memory of what began as an amazing day by recapturing my peaceful blessing.
Today is an amazing day, the sun is out in full with a nice toasty warmth to it. I like heat especially when I am in a pool. Waiting on a table is a tall glass topped with ice, then freshly brewed black tea poured on the heaping frozen cubes bringing it to a perfectly refreshing temperature. No sugar to spoil this simple refreshment. While I only have the tea it is a fine day in time to enjoy the small stuff is so easy to do yet day in and day out I forget to be grateful, some times I am fixed on this idea that my task of seeking my purpose is too important, more important than the small tokens given each day.
As I sat down ice tea on my left of the redwood rocker under a shady tree planned on writing about why this path that I have begun, hence the title which is more important. Above purpose way above feeling accepted must be to find satisfaction in being idle in the Lord’s ways. Only in doing so can I see his small but generous gifts.
* Bible verse found through the link provided for Beliefnet